2017

And there you have it, another year has left us all. The ludicrous rapidity of time has left me bewildered once more. Oh 2016, what do I have to say about you... You were not the best of years, and you certainly were not the worst. Some days you lifted me up so high that I could barely see the ground below. Some days you left me weakened after viciously sucking every inch of air out of my helpless body. Some days I was just floating through between the good and bad - feeling like I'm not making much of a difference in this fast pacing world that we are living in. 

With that said however, I am grateful for a manifold of things. The past year had been primarily revolved around family, and that is something that I am immensely thankful for. I am also thankful that I got to direct my full attention and focus on building my brand, Monokerom. Although it has been a tough and somewhat slow journey, with hard work and dedication, it has turned out to be a fruitful one. And of course I am grateful for my little dude, and being able to witness him grow from a squiggly baby to a toddler who is akin to an Energizer bunny.

Okay, lets talk resolutions. Every year I fall victim to making a list of resolutions with promises of "sticking to it this year". I don't necessarily follow through every single resolution (gotta work on that), but I still enjoy preparing new ones every year, and try to have the most fun in getting them achieved. I believe that resolutions should be helpful stepping stones in creating you into a stronger and wiser self, not a do or die situation that makes you feel guilty if not reached. Set yourself up for success, and have fun no matter what - you don't have to take life so seriously all the time. Make a conscious effort to be happy no matter the obstacle you are faced with in the present or the future. To be honest, I am saying all this as a reminder for my own self. I need to constantly keep these words fresh in my head as fuel to keep me going because otherwise, I'd be running back into my little protective cocoon the first chance I get!

Below are some resolutions that I have come up for myself;

#1 Focus on what I have, instead of on what I don't
I am guilty of perpetually focusing more on what I don't have rather than the innumerable amount of things that I am already blessed with. More often than not, this would in turn affect my spirits negatively. The more we focus on what we don't have, the more deprived we feel. It is merely impossible to feel fulfilled if you keep focusing on what you lack. So this year I hope to realise what I have, appreciate it, and take care of it. I choose to constantly be thankful and smile about what I have instead of frowning about what I don't. I may not have the best of everything, but with God's blessings I have more than what most people do - a roof over my head, food on the table, and supportive people all around me. 

#2 Eat healthier and exercise regularly
By eating healthier, I don't just mean add an extra portion of vegetables onto my plate (if there are any veggies there in the first place - yuck), and by exercising regularly, I don't just mean performing a fifteen-minute workout routine three times a week at home. I'm talking less junk food, less sugar intake (this is going to be the hardest!), less oily cuisines, and drink more water. I also hope to start running again this year - no more excuses. Can't remember the last time I ran or why I even stopped, to be honest. I used to love it so much, and now I don't even know where my running shoes are. It's time to get back in the game!

#3 Learn a third language
I am actually in the midst of teaching myself Japanese. I have yet to master the language enough to have a full-fledged conversation, but I'm getting there!

#4 Have more adventures
This one speaks for itself, and has an essentially permanent spot on my annual resolutions list. These adventures can be in the form of anything and everything. To me adventures are anything that propose excitement with a light layer of fear. Things that push our boundaries, and force us to grow in one way or another. They can be fun, scary, and maybe even hard work. So this year once again, I vow to have more adventures which includes travelling, new work ventures, and being open to change and the unfamiliar. There are so many things that I want to do, and so many places that I want to go. From this point onwards, I'm viewing everything as an adventure waiting to be experienced.

#5 Cultivate and strengthen Monokerom (+ new project)
Needless to say, Monokerom is no where near the finish line. In fact, this is only the beginning for us. There are still a multitude of things that we want to achieve, and to share with the world. With that said, I'm also hoping to start on a new project that have been on my mind for eons. So here's to another year of more creating, art, and passion!

Route to Happiness

I had recently just resigned from my full-time job as a stylist at a well-renowned e-commerce company - something I'd never thought I'd do so soon. There were several aspects that had contributed to my decision - most of them revolving around my state of mind, and my world that is my son.

When I first started working at the company, it was still relatively small. There were just a handful of us, and the amount of workload was still manageable for our small team. But within the two years that I was working there, the company grew at a rapid pace. With our team barely expanding, that meant more work for us. And more work meant more hours spent at the office, and less time to do just about anything else. About halfway through that two-year journey, I gained a son, hence more hours spent at the office also meant less chance I get to see my kid grow up. You see, I have always envisioned myself as a career-driven woman even as and/or when I have children of my own. I was caught off-guard at how much of a dilemma I was left in when my maternity leave was over. Leaving your child at home for the majority of your day isn't as easy as I presumed it would be.

After months of contemplation and going back and forth, I finally decided that I need to find other career options - one that will allow me to pursue my passion, yet still have plenty of time with my son.

"Why don't you just start that clothing line you've always wanted?" Hafiz.
"Hmm.. I don't think I'm ready for that." Me.
"Why? What's stopping you?" Hafiz.
"... I don't know." Me.
"Just do it. I'll help you." Hafiz.

And so with a little bit of push from my husband, we did it. If I hadn't started it then, I don't know if I ever will, to be honest. In the words of my husband, "Don't think too much about it. Just do it.". In relation to that - this year's resolution is to kick self-doubt right in the butt.

Thus, the birth of Monokerom.

I am eminently aware that creating my own brand from scratch isn't a simple task, and success won't come knocking on my door overnight - but now that I have left my full-time job, I have no choice but to aim and work for prosperity. For my son, my husband, and of course myself. Oh, and my traveling fund too (ha ha just kidding... maybe). Good motivation, no? Coming up with the brand image wasn't too difficult, as I already knew which direction I was gonna take. What was hard, is hard, is the fact that I do not have any designing background, hence no illustration skills, no draping skills, and no sewing skills. But it's okay because when there is a will, there is a way. All I've got to do is just believe in myself. That, and work exceptionally hard.

I am both excited and nervous for what's to come. Let's hope this will really lead me to the route of my happiness.

VM Noobie

After three months of scrambling from one window to another, I am finally done with my second internship. Phew. The ninety days of me being a visual merchandising intern was by far the most tiring period of my life. Five pair of hands, twenty-eight stores, seven states -- could I be blamed? With that said however, I did enjoy my short stint working under the well-renowned spanish fashion house. Before I was in fashion school, I didn't know how very much important visual merchandisers are to the industry. I previously thought that the mannequins were handled by the store promoters -- and by handled I mean, the changing of the garments, and only that. Needless to say, I was unaware that the lighting, props, position of the mannequins, are usually meticulously planned by a group of people known as visual merchandisers.

Intrigued by the subject, I had decided to entertain my engrossment by getting some hands-on experience. Truth be told, I had underestimated the workload of a visual merchandiser by a mile despite already knowing what their tasks and duties are. During my time at the company, I had changed nothing less than thirty windows. Every two weeks or so, we will be given dossiers and garment lists by the company's headquarter in Spain, and are expected to change the whole look of the windows according to the two lists. A typical working day for us would sound something like this:-

1. Select garments based on garment list.
2. Iron and/or steam garments to perfection.
3. Untie and undress mannequins.
4. Disable and remove previous window props, flooring, stickers.
5. Assemble new flooring, and props.
6. Dress mannequins, and position them accordingly.
7. Locate and place additional accessories.
8. Apply stickers onto the windows.
9. Prepare price lists for window display.

Believe me, it isn't as easy as it sounds. Especially when you are constantly being pressured by time, and have to change the look of two to three windows by yourself (if you're lucky, with a partner). I didn't expect to be on all fours and get both my hands dirty working as a visual merchandiser -- like I've mentioned before fashion is not all about 'lights, camera and action'. I felt like a contractor, a decorator, a stylist, and more. Did I mention the crazy working hours? The earliest I had to be on the go was at 7.30AM, and the latest I had to stay on was until 1AM. In more ways than one, I did enjoy the job. I liked how I was almost always never in the office, and always on the move from one place to another, traveling from one state to another. I liked how I was able to put my sense of creativity into good use. The job was exhausting, but never boring. The sole reason why I had to turn the company's job offer down was because I couldn't afford to travel so much given my decision to settle down.

Bigger things await, insyaAllah.